Preparing for Your Child’s First Period

More Than Just a Date on the Calendar

It can arrive quietly or with a splash of drama. It might show up after weeks of questions, or take everyone by surprise. No matter how it happens, a child’s first period marks one of the most significant milestones of puberty — and not just for them. As a parent, it’s your opportunity to provide comfort, knowledge, and support that lasts a lifetime.

But let’s be honest. Many of us didn’t receive much guidance ourselves. Maybe your first period was confusing, painful, or even embarrassing. And now, you’re faced with the task of preparing your own child, and you want to get it right.

This blog is a comprehensive, warm, and practical guide to first-period preparation. Whether your child is 8 or 13, this article will help you approach menstruation with confidence and clarity. You’ll learn what to expect, how to talk about it, what to buy, and how to empower your child through one of life’s earliest and most personal changes.

Understanding First Menstruation: What Happens and When

When Does the First Period Typically Start?

Most children get their first period, known as menarche, between the ages of 10 and 15, with the average being around 12 years old. However, some may start as early as 8, especially if puberty begins early (a condition called precocious puberty).

According to the NHS, early signs that menstruation is approaching include:

• Breast development (often 2–3 years before the first period)
• Pubic and underarm hair
• Growth spurts
• Vaginal discharge (a clear or white fluid) appearing 6–12 months beforehand.

Every child is different, so there’s no “right age” — only their natural pace.

What Actually Happens in the Body?

Menstruation is part of the menstrual cycle, which prepares the body for a possible pregnancy. Each month:

1. Hormones trigger the lining of the uterus to thicken.
2. An egg is released (ovulation).
3. If the egg isn’t fertilised, the uterus sheds its lining — this is the period.

The blood and tissue leave the body through the vagina, usually lasting 3–7 days. The cycle then repeats roughly every 28–35 days, though it can be irregular at first.

Creating a Safe, Shame-Free Space

Why It’s Crucial to Start Early

Don’t wait for the first period to begin the conversation. When kids are armed with knowledge beforehand, they’re less likely to panic or feel ashamed. Treat menstruation like any other natural process — as normal as brushing teeth or learning to tie shoes.

Use age-appropriate language and offer information gradually, allowing your child to ask questions. Revisit the topic often, so it becomes part of regular dialogue, not a one-off “talk.”

How to Talk About Periods with Confidence

It’s okay to feel awkward, but don’t let that stop you. Your calmness becomes their confidence.

Here are a few tips:

• Be factual and warm: “Your period means your body is working as it should. It’s part of growing up.”
• Use proper terms: Avoid euphemisms like “Aunt Flo.” Call it what it is: a period or menstruation.
• Normalise the experience: Share your own first-period story (in age-appropriate detail) and how you felt.

If you’re co-parenting or if the primary caregiver is male, know that dads and sons can (and should) be part of the conversation, too. Girls deserve to know that periods aren’t secret or shameful — they’re normal.

What to Include in a First Period Kit

Creating a period starter kit is one of the most practical and empowering things you can do. It shows your child they’re prepared and supported.

Essentials for a first-period kit:

• Pads: Start with regular pads with wings. Avoid tampons or menstrual cups until they ask or feel ready.
• A small zip pouch: For keeping supplies discreetly in a school bag or locker.
• Spare underwear
• Wipes or tissues
• Hand sanitiser
• A note of encouragement: A small handwritten message can go a long way.

Place a full kit in their school bag, and keep extras at home, in your car, or at their other carer’s home.

Answering the Common Questions Kids Ask

“Will it hurt?”

The first period often causes cramps, which feel like aching or pressure in the lower abdomen.
You can offer reassurance and explain that:

• Warmth (a heat pack) can help
• Light stretching or movement may ease discomfort
• Over-the-counter medication (like paracetamol or ibuprofen) is safe if needed, with guidance

“How much blood comes out?”

Usually between 4 to 6 tablespoons over several days. It might look like more, especially on pads. Explain that this is normal and not dangerous.

“Can people tell I’m on my period?”

Reassure them that periods aren’t visible unless they tell someone. Teach them how to change pads discreetly and track their cycle so they’re not caught off guard.

“Is something wrong if I skip a month?”

Irregular periods are completely normal in the first year or two. The body is adjusting to its new rhythm. It doesn’t mean something is wrong.

Supporting Your Child Emotionally

Let Them Lead

Every child reacts differently. Some feel proud or curious, while others may be embarrassed or anxious. Your job isn’t to force excitement — it’s to let them feel what they feel, without pressure or shame.

You can say:

• “However you feel about your period, it is okay.”
• “I’m here if you ever need to talk or if something feels confusing.”

Avoid over-celebrating unless your child welcomes it. Some might not want cake or fanfare — others may find it empowering.

Be Ready for Mood Swings

Hormonal changes can affect emotions. Mood swings are completely natural. Your child may cry more easily, feel more irritable, or experience heightened anxiety. Validate their feelings and support them with rest, food, and reassurance.

Keep Conversations Open and Ongoing

Don’t treat the first period as a final milestone. Keep the dialogue going:

• “Have you noticed any changes this month?”
• “Do you want to try a different type of pad?”
• “Is there anything you wish you’d known earlier?”

Revisiting the topic keeps the trust open and gives them permission to ask questions as they grow.

Period Care Do’s and Don’ts

Do:

• Teach proper hygiene (changing pads every 4–6 hours)
• Encourage wearing comfortable, leak-resistant underwear
• Emphasise hydration and nutritious food during periods
• Celebrate autonomy — let them choose products and manage privacy

Don’t:

• Shame them for leaking or forgetting
• Pressure them into using tampons before they’re ready
• Use periods as a reason to skip conversations about exercise, movement or confidence

Encouraging Body Positivity and Respect

Menstruation often starts when children become acutely aware of their bodies. This can be overwhelming, especially if paired with other changes like breast development, weight shifts, or acne.

Use this time to reinforce:

• That their body is strong, capable and trustworthy
• That all bodies develop differently, and that’s okay
• That menstruation is a sign of health, not something to hide or apologise for

Teaching Boys About Periods Too

This isn’t just a “girls’ issue.” Boys also need to understand menstruation — not only for future empathy, but to help reduce the stigma and teasing that still occurs in many school settings.

Include boys in age-appropriate discussions:

• What periods are
• Why they happen
• How to be respectful and supportive

This helps boys grow into compassionate classmates, friends, partners, and future parents.

When to See a Doctor

While most period-related symptoms are normal, watch for:

• Extremely heavy bleeding (soaking through pads in under 2 hours)
• Periods that last more than 8 days
• Severe pain that limits activity
• No period by age 15 with other signs of puberty

In these cases, book an appointment with your GP or a paediatric gynaecologist.

Conclusion: Helping Your Child Feel Prepared, Not Panicked

Preparing for your child’s first period is about so much more than pads and calendars. It’s about laying a foundation of body literacy, emotional safety, and self-respect.

You don’t need to be an expert. You don’t need to have the perfect answer to every question. What matters most is that your child knows:

• They can trust their body.
• They can come to you.
• Periods are a natural, manageable part of growing up.

So take the first step today: start the conversation, pack that kit, and normalise the journey. Your empathy now will echo for years to come.

What helped you prepare for your child’s first period — or what do you wish you’d known sooner? Share your story in the comments and help build a kinder, more informed parenting community.